Most important rule to keep in mind: being diaper-free should never be a source of stress for the caregiver, and more importantly for the baby. It is a gentle process whereby the caregiver offers potty-tunities (opportunities) to the baby to relieve himself (eliminate pee or poo) by holding him over a toilet or a sink. A shhh sound communicates to baby it’s okay to go. Thus, also known as “elimination communication.”

Infants are born with the instinct to remain dry and not soil themselves. Although, they may not have full bladder control, they are able to temporarily hold-in their pee/poo, which gives their caregiver enough time to carry them to an appropriate place and signal them it’s okay to go. This is a time-consuming process which requires caregivers to be in-tune with the baby and recognize his cues (such as grunting) and pattern of elimination (need to pee right after waking up and shortly after eating or slow down of pee before sleeptime) in combination with potty-tunities (keep offering potty gently every hour or so).

Today’s parenting is all about convenience. Due to the time-consuming nature of this process, most people would balk at this “natural” technique of helping babies meet the basic need of elimination. We try to remain positive and continue to remind ourselves:

1. One less diaper in the landfill
2. One step closer to potty training
3. Savings of 70-100 dollars per month! Potentially 1000s of dollars overall.
4. Prevent painful diaper rash
5. Frequent cleaning of house floors

So many reasons to keep going!

So, how did we get here?

First three months with my newborn were primarily spent in establishing breastfeeding. Once we nailed that, my maternity leave of 12 weeks was almost over. Generally, breastfed baby poop doesn’t stink at all. We had been warned, diaper changes really start sucking once baby is on solids and much older, and gagging becomes a part of your life as you change stinky poopy toddler diapers. My hubby and I awaited this horror, but now that we have chosen the diaper-free route we may never go thru this life altering experience. Rest assured I won’t miss it. In the last 4 months, we have caught ALL but one of our baby’s poo in a potty or toilet. His fecal waste has “responsibly” been flushed down the sewage system with the rest of biodegradable human waste where it really belongs! Now, baby pee is a totally different ballgame. We clean up a couple of accidents on a daily basis. On a good day, there is only one accident.

But really, how did we get here?

As a first time mom, I suffer from the mommy syndrome of excessive worrying over anything and everything. I have to remind myself to slow down and enjoy mommyhood, rather than obsess over trying to do everything right. But I simply cannot help it. Diaper rash is one of the things that kept me up at night. As a working mommy, I have to entrust someone else to care for my baby. When my maternity leave was about to end, my tiny baby looked so helpless and the thought of how much he depended on others to meet his basic needs gave me serious anxiety. What if he wasn’t fed in time? What if he wasn’t changed in time? Thinking about my soiled baby wallowing in his excrement, waiting to be changed gave me anxiety. Painful diaper rashes are not an uncommon sight I’ve been told. I stumbled upon elimination communication on my favorite mommy site – kellymom.com.

When I pitched this idea to my hubby, he thought this was a Pakistani thing. I laughed, “Nope. The whole world follows the West. This concept is as foreign to my Pakistani friends, as it is to you and I.”

We were actually late starters to begin at 6 months. The optimal window is birth to 4 months. The longer babies are kept in diapers the more disconnected they get with their natural bodily function of elimination, and get more accustomed with going into their diaper. Toddler potty training is essentially teaching them to unlearn going in the diaper.

At the end of the day, we are still contributing to the growing (27.4 billion a year) disposal diaper pile in the landfills by using one diaper a day for nighttime. Castor is nowhere near ready for nighttime training. One attempt went horribly wrong and I will dare not try again for a while! I tried putting him on the potty in the middle of the night, and the blood curdling screams of “why mommy why? Why are you disrupting my sleep” as he hit his head accidentally on the bed side while trying to balance himself on the toddler potty was enough for me to back off instantly!